February 2012
14 posts
Garrett is coming over and we’re going to ihop.
He won’t let me pay for my food and I am just like ‘Dude, come on, I’m not that important.’
I try too hard. I try too fucking hard to stay sane. I try and pretend that I am fine, and normally, it works, but this just isn’t going to do.
I’m not fine right now. I’m not going to be fine. How to you expect me to be fine after saying ‘Okay, since I make life so hard for you, I won’t talk to you and bother you anymore. Your emails are now blocked. Goodbye and...
i have never wanted to punch someone so hard as i do my cousin right now.
you listen to music for the ‘instrumental beauty,’ i listen to it for the meaning. i listen to the music that saves people; that keeps them sane.
i must admit, i am one of those people that music saves.
What if I actually shaved my head?
That’d be interesting.
I think Garrett likes me now holy crap. I went to a Valentine’s party with him and he stayed with me the whole time. This is nice but I think I’m a bit confused really.
With Justin, it was just like, relationship immediately. With Garrett, it’s like we’re waiting until our feelings become a relationship.
I LIKE THIS YOU GUYS, I LIKE IT A LOT.
And actually, I kissed a boy tonight! He came over to my friend’s house and I guess that was my version of ‘hey’ because he was really attractive.
And because I was high
Heh
But really I want to kiss things when I’m high so I really couldn’t help it.
I washed with my dad’s new body wash because I am lonely and it makes me feel like a boy is around.
Ha….ha Your Hands Are Cold would start playing….
Drama with your ex sucks.
That is all.
2 tags
Anyways, there’s this band called Far. I really like their cover of Pony by Ginuwine, but… I just can’t like anything else of theirs. I downloaded all of their albums… and I just don’t like them. Other than the cover.
I watched The Art of Getting By last night, and it was really really good. Tonight, I’m going to watch Hugo. I hope it’s good, ahh.
Sometimes I just get so overwhelmed with happiness, I’ll just sit here and sob. I mean literally sob. I sound like it’s the end of the world or something when I do that, but no, I’m really just happy.
I really don’t know where I’d be without you guys. You guys honestly saved my life, and I’m really grateful that I have all of you to talk to. I just
...
I swear if my cousin is getting married and I’m going to be in the wedding, I’m not going to a dress fitting.
There’s just… things on my sides that are very visible. I don’t want Brittany to know about it, let alone a stranger that works at a store.
January 2012
30 posts
The Lord of the Rings means everything to me. I love every character, the story, but I guess why I love it as much as I do… is because it was there for me when my mom wasn’t.
It’s still there for me; it makes me feel better, especially if I’m worrying a lot.
I just… I’m really, very thankful for it.
I DON’T WANT TO LIVE ON A BEACH (WOLLONGONG)
I WANT TO LIVE IN THE COUNTRYSIDE AND HAVE COWS (BEGA)
Maybe moving to Bega isn’t such a good idea. There’d be nothing for me to do there.
I just thought that I’d found the perfect college, the perfect house, the perfect.. everything.
I just found out that the University of Wollongong at Bega doesn’t provide the course to get my Bachelor of Creative Arts degree.
I…
I think I might cry.
all i want
is ricotta cheese
but my leg hurts
and it’s 1 am
goodnight
Huh.
Well I like to write poems and sometimes I put poems together and make them into songs…
But last night my parents were making me feel all poopy because they were like ‘I DON’T LOVE YOU, BLAHBLAHBLAH’ and I’m sure you get what happened after that.
They make me honestly turn into a nervous wreck when they fight and I just kind of… space out and panic to...
I’m actually surprised at how well I feel. I thought I’d be a mess, but nope. I feel really good.
I really think this was for the best. Last time, it wasn’t. Maybe that was why I was such a wreck.
Anyways, I’m still very happy!
I just rediscovered two bands I listened to about 6 or so years ago, and I am SO EXCITED.
Also, I’m craving Harris Teeter’s sugar cookies. At my Harris Teeter, they’d have little sample ones and I’d take about 5 of them. They’re the best cookies ever and I want them in my mouth right now. RIGHT NOW.
if they shut mediafire down i will
well i don’t know what i’ll do
Still feeling happy.
Happy happy happy.
1 tag
I feel a lot better today. When I say a lot, I mean 90% better.
I’m happy again. But, my emotions are a jerk, so I’ll probably be sad again tomorrow. Who knows.
As for now, I’m really really happy. I almost feel as if I couldn’t be happier. And that makes me happy.
i think you deserve a big punch of reality
in the face
I will never, ever, understand algebra. Ever. Ever. Ever.
1 tag
i am totally, completely… heartbroken.
Hey.
I feel like someone just put a pile of bricks on my body and left me there to die. Yep, that sums up how I feel right now.
I can’t stop having anxiety attacks and my whole body just.. hurts. And I’m sad. Which everyone knows, is never fun.
I stayed at home all day today. I kept having heart palpitations, so I was really uncomfortable for a few hours.
As of now, I’m doing alright. I had two cherry limeades so I bet my blood sugar is sky high. But, I’m going to try and go to bed. I woke up at 8:30 this morning because of Iver’s tweeting, but then I fell back asleep around 10 and woke up at 2. I really want to get...
I still have my cherry limeade left so I’m gonna drink that and go to bed! Woo!!!
I feel.. happy. A lot happier than I have been.
Lately I’ve been kidding myself. I try and make myself think that I’m actually happy, when I’m just forcing myself to be. That results in terrible sadness.
But now, I really am happy. I’m not sad at all. I’m completely worry-free, and that’s all I’ve wanted for… a really long time.
I’m so...
Today, I went to target, and I went to Taco Bell.
For some reason, I keep having panic attacks in the shower. I’m not sure if I’m hydrophobic or claustrophobic, or both, but bleh, I’m tired of not being able to breathe. When I’m not showering, though, I’m totally fine. It’s odd.
Anyways, everyone go to Taco Bell and get a cherry limeade sparkler. Or a limeade...
Can I just say how much I love the 2 freckles on my lip.
I just think they are the cutest thing.
I actually prefer this tumblr over bumbershoots (well, now burningondesire)
I can just say whatever I want and I don’t have to worry about certain people seeing it. I’m calmer here.
1 tag
basically i feel sick every time i think about you. and i don’t like it.
why did i fall in love with you when i knew nothing would happen? now it’s killing me inside.
i’ve been crying off and on all day. why am i sad, when this is what i wanted for myself?
1 tag
all i have to say is.
you could’ve at least responded.
i will never be truly happy until i find someone who loves me.
you can try all you want to make me happy, but it won’t work. it just won’t.
i am almost tempted to write ‘H3H3H3’ in your ask
I can’t tell if I’m having really bad hemiplegic headaches or if I’m about to have another stroke.
I can’t really gather my thoughts well and it’s really hard for me to talk… as well as the insanely bad head aching.
I don’t even know if that made sense.
I’ve been like this since yesterday, and I CAN’T HANDLE IT.
December 2011
44 posts
I woke up and I have a cold.
Well. I’M GETTING MY NEW YEAR’S KISS WHETHER JUSTIN LIKES IT OR NOT.
I JUST WANT TO JUMP AROUND MAN THIS IS SO GREAT I LIKE NOT BEING SINGLE
So I’m back with my boyfriend. I mean, my ex-boyfriend, I guess.
I’m really happy about it this time. Not that I wasn’t happy before, but this time, I feel like he really does care about me.
I have been so bored. All I’ve been doing is downloading music, and I can’t think of anything to download ahh.
But anyways, I’m sick, so all I really can do is sit around and eat soup/drink tea/apple cider.
I just got a really big craving for fish sticks and tater tots.
The wind is going crazy. It sounds almost as if there is a tornado outside, but it is completely clear and sunny.
Anyways, it’s (supposedly) supposed to snow tonight around 9. If it does, it will be awesome.
1 tag
I love when I’m listening to Illuminate by Lydia, how the songs just blend together perfectly. That’s probably why it’s my favorite album of all time.